1. I get to help people.
2. Sometimes, when police officers come into dispatch to get paperwork I throw stuff at them….just cuz I can.
3. I get to serve and protect those that serve and protect.
4. When my job is entertaining, it’s REALLY entertaining.
5. When my job is boring, I seek comfort in the fact that it’s boring because people aren’t requesting help.
6. My co-workers all have a twisted sense of humor whether they want to or not.
7. I get to help catch bad guys.
8. I get to be the disembodied voice of a police department.
9. I get to hear stories about sloppy drunks, strange injuries and grotesque deaths but I don’t have to see or smell these things.
10. The public knows that help is just a 9-1-1 call away. Police officers and firefighters know that help is just a radio transmission away. They know this because dispatchers and operators across the county have earned this reputation. I get to live up to this expectation everyday I go to work.

April 11-17, 2010 is National Public Safety Telecommunicators Week. If you’re a 9-1-1 operator, a police dispatcher, a fire dispatcher, etc., then thank you for what you do every day!

Related posts:

1. Emergency Alerts in On-Demand World
2. Police: The Unwitting Victims of Racism
3. Shave a dispatcher! Save a girl!

Irish Pub Joke #1

An Irish man shows up in a pub one day and orders three pints of Guinness. He takes sips from each glass until they are empty and calls the bartender for three more. The bartender says, ‘Sure it’s up to yourself, but wouldn’t you rather I was bringing them one at a time? Then they’ll be fresh and cold.’
‘Nah…’ your man says, ‘ I’m preferrin’ that ye bring ‘em three at a time. You see, me and me two brothers would meet at a pub and drink and have good times. Now one is in Australia, the other in Canada and I’m here. We agreed before we split up that we’d drink to each other’s honour this way.’

‘Well,’ says the bartender, ‘that’s a grand thing to do, all right. I’ll bring the pints as you ask.’

Well, time goes on and your man’s peculiar habit is known and accepted by all the pub regulars. One day though, he comes in and orders only two pints. A hush falls over the pub. Naturally, everyone figures something happened to one of the brothers. A group of the regulars corner the bartender and finally persuade him to find out what happened. With a heavy heart, the bartender brings the two pints and says, ‘Here’s your pints… and let me offer my sincerest condolences. What happened?’

The Irish man looks extremely puzzled for a moment, and then starts laughing.

‘Oh, no, no, no! ‘Tis nothing like that. You see, I’ve given up drinking for Lent…’

Irish Pub Joke #2

 An Irish man has been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So your man stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he’ll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up.
Once outside he stands up but again falls flat on his face. He crawls home. Reaching the door he tries to stand up, and yet again, falls flat on his face. He crawls through the door and up the stairs. When he reaches his bed he summons the last of his strength and tries one final time to stand.

It’s no use. He tumbles into bed and is soon sound asleep, only to awaken the next morning to the sound of his wife standing over him shouting.

‘So… you’ve been out drinking again!’

‘How did you know?’ he asks, his head hung in shame.

‘The pub called– you left your damn wheelchair down there again!’

Irish Pub Joke #3

An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scotsman go into a pub. Each orders a pint of Guinness. Just as the bartender hands them over, three flies buzz down and land– one, two, three– in each of the pints.
The Englishman looks disgusted, pushes his pint away and demands another… the Scotsman picks out the fly, shrugs, and takes a long swallow.

The Irishman reaches in to the glass, grabs the fly between his fingers and shakes him as hard as he can, shouting ‘Spit it out, ya bloody bastard! Spit it out!’ 

I’m not this funny by myself. I took these from http://islandireland.com/Pages/folk/sets/toasts.html

Happy St. Patrick’s Day everyone!

Related posts:

1. One of my favorite calls ever!

It’s the weekend before St. Patrick’s Day. Usually a weekend where we’re busy at work with DUIs, noise complaints and general drunken stupidness. So far tonight has been pretty dead, but it reminds me of one of my favorite calls I’ve ever taken:

The caller’s name was Colleen McBlahblah (not her real last name). She wanted to press assault charges on her sister, Kelly McBlahblah (same last name). What happened? Colleen and Kelly were at the Old Dubliner and Colleen gave Kelly money to go get a couple beers. Kelly went to the bar, but didn’t get Colleen a beer and didn’t give her the money back. Colleen got mad. Kelly got mad too and punched Colleen in the face. “Why is this funny?” you ask. The incident as a headline: 2 Irish sisters get in fight at Irish pub on St. Patty’s Day weekend over beer. That’s just awesome!!

Related posts:

1. 3 Pub Jokes for St. Patrick’s Day